“Nature versus Nurture”, a phrase related to whether your hereditary traits or the environment most impacts human psychological development. Regardless, I have been blessed to have two fathers and I am thankful for them both. No, not like that. Even if it was like that, would it matter? Nah. I didn’t think so.
My biological father passed away before I was born serving in the military. There are still fights at every family fathering concerning who truly coined my pretty awesome & southern “government” name which was inspired by him. Nature will show you there is no denying this man is my father. Not only do I take after my father in the looks department (it translates incredibly well to my female form – thank you, Sir), but we talk alike, and have the same facial and hand gestures. Personality wise, I inherited his outgoing, endearingly charming ways and penchant for helping others. There is still so much I do not know about him but I take comfort in what I do know. Regardless of my father not being here, I tell myself that he sent someone in to be my father. That’s where my “Daddy” aka “Pops” aka “My Homie” steps in.
Every year on my birthday, Pops calls to tell me a story. One afternoon, he was napping and he randomly jolted awake feeling someone’s eyes on him. He turned around and there I was, a little less than a year old, holding myself up in my crib. He smiled at me and I smiled at him and started laughing. He always tells me it was that moment he knew he was my Dad. His involvement in my life nurtured my soul and instilled in me many values. We are both stubborn in the best way, honest (though I was a rebel as a teenager so this one came around 17), and persistent. We believe and understand the need to sacrifice and indulge only when we can, to cultivate creativity, and the ability to think outside the box. Finally, he was the real example of how to love unconditionally and forgive easily. Thanks to my Dad, I have an affinity for the music of the 70’s and 80’s. I know a thing or two about a good Bourbon and Scotch. I love motorcycles, and I can rough it outdoors. Believe it or not, what I learned most from my father is that I can be strong and feminine.
So, what influences our character most? Nature or nurture? Either way, in my case, I take comfort in knowing that I have received the best of both worlds. I take comfort in the fact that I have two amazing fathers – one guiding me from the spiritual realm and the other here on this earthly plane.
To all the awesome Fathers out there… especially you silver foxes, Happy Father’s Day!